Mummy blog

29th January 2020

💙 EDDISON 💙

Eddison Mark Peacock – this is the name we have given you. But I sit and look at you in wonder of what name you will make for yourself.

Will you grow up to be recognised as loving?

Will you have a reputation of being kind?

Will people know you love to explore?

What will your name represent? What will people think of when they hear your name? What will they associate with you?

I have so many questions about your future and I’m so excited to see how you grow and who you become. But for now I will soak up your newness, our little Eddison 💙

24th January 2020

💙 BABY BLUES 💙

I’ve only ever used this profile as a platform to talk openly and honestly about my motherhood journey and have found strength in you guys along the way. It only feels right to talk about “the baby blues” as it’s something completely natural that affects 80% of us!

Last night I suddenly and randomly started crying and so I rang my Mam. When she picked up the phone and asked me “what’s the matter?”, without thinking I replied “I’m feeling really overwhelmed” and that’s when I realised myself that the baby blues had hit me! I wasn’t sad. I can’t tell you what had triggered the tears. I just knew I wanted to speak to my Mam about it.

As mothers we put ourselves through so much emotionally and physically and often neglect our own wellbeing by putting our little ones first. For me, Otis had been the centre of my world for 3 years and the sudden realisation that he now has to share me made the mum guilt rear it’s ugly head. All through pregnancy I wondered how he would cope in his new role, I often forgot to consider how I would cope too! However I take in that lush newborn smell from Eddison and I swear it has super healing powers.

The baby blues is a sense of feeling emotional, irrational and overwhelmed. They can cause you to be tearful without understanding why and can also lead to feeling anxious, irritable and moody. It’s a result of that drop in hormones after childbirth, but also triggered by that weight of responsibility of having a brand new tiny human to take care of.

But I want to tell you all it’s ok to feel like this. It’s ok to be tearful. It’s ok to feel overwhelmed. And actually completely natural! I would encourage anyone who feels like this to talk openly about these feelings and be honest with friends and family. The emotions are quite mild, but if at all they start to get stronger and the tears become regular, then your GP would be happy to talk you through things and make sure you are ok.

We’ve got this, Mamas! 💪🏼

24th January 2020

🐧 BRISTOL ZOO 🐧

Yesterday to celebrate our smallest little Prince becoming a week old, the 4 of us (still crazy saying that) headed to Bristol Zoo for the day. Correction: afternoon. Because we didn’t actually make it out of the house until 1:20pm 🙈

It was really good to get out and have some fresh air for a few hours. We really did enjoy ourselves and it was so fun seeing how excited Otis was about exploring (more so than wanting to stop and watch all the animals).

In the penguin enclosure though I did have a bit of a moment. Otis was walking around the area, wanting to see things and play with the interactive bits. He wasn’t running off, just showing an interest in everything! At the same time Eddison wanted a feed. There were no seats so I’m walking behind trying to breastfeed my newborn and push the pram at the same time, trying to keep up with Otis. And it dawns on me that actually a day out like this with both boys, without my husband, is going to be so difficult if not impossible at the moment. And then the dreaded mum guilt hit as I though about how my days out with Otis have changed forever.

However I was brought back down to my happy reality and out of my mild panic as I remembered that before I know it, they will have each other to play with and explore with and that is the greatest gift I could give to Otis. Our family dynamic sure has changed and is a bit more manic, but that will make trips out like yesterday even more special 💙

My husband captured this photos of Otis wanting to hold and cuddle his baby brother as I was trying to get a photo of them next to each other. He really is the sweetest big brother, I’m so proud of him!

18th January 2020

❤️ MIDWIFE ❤️

This is my midwife Kate and she is a true, modern-day superhero!

After quite a traumatic delivery with Otis, it’s safe to say I was very anxious about my labour and birth this time and worried about the things that could go wrong and my choices being taken away from me. Then God sent me Kate and I couldn’t have wished for a better midwife who would have been a stronger advocate for me and how I wanted my labour to go. Every step of my journey, Kate was with me and had my back. She helped me achieve my dream water birth of Eddison and then when things got complicated, she provided me with the emotional support and protection I needed and came with me to hospital and stayed too, making sure everyone was aware of my previous experience and putting personalised plans in motion to protect me from trauma this time. At a time when I felt the most vulnerable and scared in my life, I was able to find strength and calm through her.

Did you know that “midwife” means “with woman”? Well this photo shows exactly what it means to be a midwife – at one with the woman they care for. This is the moment I held my new son for the first time and she is right there with me, sharing the moment whilst also doing her job of checking on him. I can’t sing her praises enough and only wish that every woman in labour was given a Kate to protect them ❤️

17th January 2020

💙 BROTHERHOOD 💙

It’s true that you don’t actually realise how awesome it is to be a member of the “all boys / girls mama” club until you’re actually in it. I always said I love the idea of having 2 boys and what that means for them growing up together. I always thought that would be something so special, to have two little Princes. Well seeing my two Princes together today just confirmed for me that I was always meant to be a boy mama!

People often told me how they thought Otis “will be the best big brother” and my response was always “I hope so”. Because to me, the thought of my baby being promoted to big brother was hard to swallow. He’s been the absolute centre of our worlds for almost 3 years and I’ll be honest and admit I was anxious he wouldn’t respond well to the change. Well it turns out that I was very wrong, Otis is just as smitten with Eddison as we are! When he came to the hospital today he straight away for excited when he saw the baby in the cot and pointed him out to us all. He showered him with kisses and wanted to hold him and give him cuddles too.

Bringing Eddison home this evening was always going to be interesting because now he’s in “Otis’ territory”. Is Otis fazed by his presence?……… not at all! In fact he’s excited to have Eddison around and even the smallest things gets him hyped up, like when he saw Eddison open his eyes for the first time and he then spent 5 minutes telling us all that Eddison has eyes! 😂 Eddison made a noise when in his Moses basket and Otis went straight over to check on him before playing with his new toy!

I can’t even express how excited I am to see what the future hold for these two new besties 💙💙

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